It’s a Lot

It seems like I an writing about my anxiety a lot these days. But I am feeling it a lot these. There is a lot going on. Running a newspaper, raising 4 children, building a house (still isnt done), and today it the llama show.

Today is probably the worst I have felt. I am a shaking, trying to deep breath and not have a panic attack mess up here today.

There are too many reasons to talk about, but let’s just say there is a lot of baggage that goes with me sitting here today, and most of it I cant solve and therefore I sit here, trying not to hold it together.

I know that people can tell, which makes it a little worse. I want to be my usual smiling, happy, sociable self, but I just cant with everything I am thinking and feeling today.

I am telling myself to just breath and get through it. I am forcing myself to focus on the job before me, and not all the “bad.”

I have anxiety, and as much as I want to crawl in a hole there are people that need me, responsibilities that I cant pass off or walk away from. So I just have to somehow get through this day, and then tomorrow, and then the next.

Just keep breathing and get through it.

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